I Closed My Business. Was I Correct in Discerning God's Will?

In the spring and early summer of 2005, I began wondering if God was asking me to take my interest in spiritual journaling and writing about my faith to a higher level. At the time, I was also very concerned about the impact of globalization on my career designing business software. I began to wonder if God was leading me to start a business "on the side" to both develop my spiritual gift of writing and provide for the financial needs of my family.

In July of 2005, I believed God wanted me to do it. I felt even if my business venture was not a financial success there must be something God wants me to learn from the process. My plan was to provide some inspirational material "for free" but also offer some Christian material available for sale as eBooks for a very nominal fee (eg. $2.95) and take payments using PayPal. I wasn't expecting to make a lot of money but I wasn't risking a lot of money either. I decided I'd rather try and fail than not try and wonder for the rest of my life whether I had missed out on serving God's purpose or missed out on some blessing He had in store for me.

I took a long lunch from work one day and drove down to the county clerk's office and for $20 took out a business license for Caleb's Publishing. The name is a reference to the Old Testament character Caleb who was one of the twelve spies Moses dispatch to scope out the promised land.
Here's what I wrote back then. (Click here for the original.)

About Caleb's Publishing™

Caleb's Publishing™ was founded by Philip Hartman in July 2005 as a "leap of faith." Like many men in their mid-40's I had achieved some success in my profession but began wondering if God had something else in mind. This then became a frequent topic in my prayer life for approximately 1.5 years. Along the way, I was introduced to the idea of combining a business with a personal ministry. I also began regularly keeping a spiritual journal and discovered I really enjoyed writing about matters of faith. What you see is the result of this spiritual journey so far. I don't know where this journey is going to take me, but that is part of the fun!

Incidentally, I highly recommend the book Halftime by Bob Buford to any man who is feeling the same way. Also, visit the halftime.org website.

I hope to serve the community by:

• Providing original and thought-provoking material to assist Sunday School teachers, small group discussion leaders, pastors, and anyone seeking a closer relationship with God
• Giving you the benefit of the many hours I have spent in research over the last several years reading various books, articles, and websites. If something was thought-provoking or convicted me, then I suspect it may have the same impact on you.
• Encouraging "regular Christians" who feel God may have chosen to use them for His purposes thru their gift of writing.
• Providing a wider, Internet audience for anyone who has a message or story to tell. I want to publish both unique Christian works and original secular works in fields such as history.

Where did the name of the company and website come from?

I devoted a lot of my spare time in the evenings over the coming months to creating a website, writing, editing some sermon materials I inherited from my father and grandfather, trying to figure out how to show up in search engines like Google, and more. I did learn a lot. I felt good about sharing my faith in this way. I was amazed to find from my website statistics that my little website got visitors from far away places like the UK, Australia, Canada, India, Finland, and more.

However, one thing I was not doing was making money. In hindsight, I have come to understand how much free Christian material is available over the Internet. (Like this blog.)

Without any real fanfare, I officially closed Caleb’s Publishing today as a business entity. The ISP still hasn’t shut the site down even though I never renewed the hosting contract.

Now I must wrestle with whether I was correct in how I discerned God’s will 1.5 years ago. Was he leading me to start the business as I thought? Does it even matter if I didn't make money (espcially if I didn't risk much money)? Was it vanity on my part? Was I right about developing my own writing but wrong about the publishing other people’s writing? Was God trying to teach me something that did not depend on whether the business made money? I guess I’ll never know for sure until I’m in heaven some day. For the moment, I'd like to think I did what He wanted. I took a chance for Him. I got out of my comfort zone. People on the other side of the world did read some of what I wrote. I might have had a positive impact.

God, have I learned the lesson about writing and publishing You wanted to teach me thru Caleb’s Publishing? Did I discern Your will correctly? If not, then I pray that You correct my ways and help me discern Your will properly. If I did, then I pray that You reveal to me what You would have me do to serve You next. Amen.

Copyright © 2006 by Philip Hartman - All Rights Reserved